The Trouble With Reality.

As the world spins, careening, bouncing, tumbling, and bumping along, it becomes increasingly difficult to see the difference between illusion and reality. When you read that Jamie Foxx, a wealthy, successful actor pulled a person from a burning vehicle you wonder if that was the news, or a preview of a new movie. Did that really happen?

When you read that Sarah Palin is endorsing Donald Trump in the Republican Presidential Primary, you have to ask; is this a publicity stunt? Are they planning a new "reality television" program The Amazing American Apprentice? Or is that really on the news? Or is this a serious endorsement of a potential president.

Is the endorsement the real prize, or just a television bonus? Ms. Palin was the Governor of Alaska for over three years, (until she resigned) if you don't count the time she spent in an unsuccessful campaign to become Vice President. And the time she spent writing her best selling book, "Going Rogue." With that resume her endorsement could be the prize behind Door #3, and the contestant would have to decide to take the cash or gamble on the potential riches. 

When the anchor person reports that El Chapo, the notorious Mexican Drug Lord was apprehended after an interview with Sean Penn you can't help but wonder if this is the news, or a trailer for a Fast Times at Ridgemont High sequel. "You will get to see Jeff Spicoli bring down the entire Mexican Marijuana Cartel." "I don't know, dude, I was just looking to score a doob." Even a remake of The Falcon and the Snowman makes more sense than reality.

Life is getting a little skewed. We here, at Life Explained Central Ohio, are afraid this may be the worst case (so far) of Life Imitating Art*. It is, we fear, only going to get worse. And you will need us now, and in the future, more than ever. But, we can't do it alone, we need you, donate generously to the Life Explained Frozen Burrito and Bottled Water Fund.** Together we can discover the truth, if it exists.

**Thank you, Oscar Wilde

**We refuse to drink tap water! what are we, savages?

***Thank you, Poe.

Breaking News,

Gene Simmons, bass player for Kiss, has rushed to the defense of the wealthy.  Claiming inclusion into the long persecuted minority, Gene Simmons has taken a stand.  No longer will people malign and mistreat those who are unfortunate enough to be ridiculously wealthy.

Mr. Simmons claims that "50% of the US population pays no taxes at all."  A remarkable feat, given the breadth of taxes assessed by various branches of government.  In Ohio, for example, to better distribute the tax burden among the citizenry our Governor is working to reduce the state income tax, and increased the sales tax, and imposing the tax on services, which were previously exempt.  Try to get out of that tax, you filthy 50%, we have your number.  And it is 5.75%, on almost everything, including haircuts, and legal advice.

However, Mr. Simmons would like it known that the much maligned, and terribly put upon 1%, of which he claims to be a member in good standing, "provides all of the jobs for everybody else," and we should "try being nice to a rich person."  Indeed, Mr. Simmons.  Next time a rich person is unfortunate enough to find himself in line next to me at Taco Bell, I will buy him a Crunch Wrap Gordito, even if it is not happy hour, I will pay full price.  I hope it is Gene Simmons, imagine tacos with a wealthy bass player.  Facebook, here we come.

I would be willing to settle for Bill Gates, or Warren Buffett, but will pass on Donald Trump, his hair looks even worse than mine, and that might be more than a poor, Taco Bell worker, who owes so much to Gene Simmons, should have to endure.

If you see a wealthy person, give them a hug, and thank them, we owe them so much.