Every Thursday employees will be required to provide their supervisor evidence of some sort of productivity for the week. This can be in the form of documents produced, spreadsheets constructed, scientific breakthroughs, or the performance of cooking, cleaning or organization of some type.
Initially we planned to have it signed in blood, but OSHA deep sixed that, and we had several managers faint, which led to some very amusing Instagram posts involving sharpies and "temporary" facial tattoos. Ink (on paper) will be sufficient.
Please prepare your documentation prior to your appointment, and remember performance art does not count toward your weekly quota.
Thank you, have a nice weekend, we will see you Monday.
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