People who know me will tell you that I hate boats! Being on a boat is one of my worst nightmares, number three, I think, but the list is not handy so there is no way to be sure. I think it goes
But, I am working from memory, so that may not be ironclad. Premature burial has to be in there somewhere. And, I know being accidentally poisoned by a hard drinking pharmacist going through a painful, expensive divorce is pretty high, too. Maybe I should just go get the list... Wait, that isn't what I am here to talk about today.
I am here to tell you about my latest search. We are buying a canoe, or maybe a tandem kayak. Wait, you are thinking, isn't a canoe, or a kayak a boat, you are demanding, rather rudely I might add.
Technically, yes they are boats. But, they are well behaved, dignified boats. Gliding with silent grace across the water, working symbiotically with humanity in a wonderful dance, almost ballet. Plus they are a great source of exercise, and I have always enjoyed canoeing. I can't explain the difference. It is there, though. Better left to philosophers.
Plus, there is no "captain" wearing a brand new coat of Jack Daniels bravado wanting to "open 'er up, and show you what she can do." Then insisting that if you tried water skiing you would love water skiing. Right until I end up sleeping with the fishes, or even worse being eaten by the Lake Watusi version of Nessie.
So, I am off today, in search of the perfect transportation. Anybody with any information regarding the relative merits of a kayak vs. a canoe please leave them in the comments.
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Water, You Have No Power Over Me, sort of
There is not much to say, but, for those who find any offense, please remember these are only stories, jokes, and have no relation to reality. Kind of like life.
I like life, and hope it lasts a long time, but it does require some explanation, that is why these blogs exist. To help people navigate times and events that make no sense.
Here are a few places you can find a few things.
The Original Life Explained. Where it all started, a little rambling and a lot of nothing important.
Life Explains The End Views on humanity's race to self extinction. I hope I am wrong.
Life Explains Smiles Because everybody likes it when you smile.
Life Explains Aging Getting older is not always easier, but it is worth the effort. And a few small things can make it much more pleasant.
Life Explains Traveling and Commuting Mostly commuting. Driving bugs me and working bugs me so driving to work is the ultimate insult of modern life, and I like to complain.
Life Explained Explores History. The real problem with history is there is so much of it. It is all over the place. But, if you take the time to look at the small pieces it is fascinating.
Life Explains Music Music is a universal language. I like guitar based rock and roll, but there is a little bit of a lot here.