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Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Technology, my old friend.

Today is a big day, here at Life Explained. well it isn't actually today. It is kind of tomorrow, and a little yesterday, and a lot of Monday. Look, we understand Monday is anathema here at Life Explained, we call it Disciplinary Monday because of all the forms, and complaints, and first aid procedures that are required just to get to to quitting time.

We spend more time filling out the 1797/J Assault, Happened in Kitchen form on Monday than the rest of the week combined. We are actually considering giving everyone their own coffee maker to avoid the confrontations. It would save a fortune on mugs, saucers, and the occasional toaster smashed over someones head, not to mention all of the synthetic, nonabsorbable monofilament used to stitch people closed again. But we have to find 237 coffee makers of the same coffee maker (no mean accomplishment) or it will be war next Monday. And nobody has time for that.

But, we are not here to talk about that. We are here to talk about the good news. Tomorrow night we are going to purchase my new iPad Pro. Which is why tomorrow is featured so prominently in the first paragraph. Obviously, today is Wednesday.

Monday is featured because my wife told me I had to make up my mind by Tuesday morning. I could never make that kind of decision in the morning, depending on how you define morning, I guess. If you say it ends at Noon, well maybe I could work my way through the process. But if the clock stops when I leave for work at 6:30 it would be futile. I need time to agonize, to let doubt creep in, and twist my thoughts, there has to be inner turmoil, a schism. I need that.

So, after hours of negotiations I decided by Monday (there's that word again) evening I had decided to allow my wife to buy me a new iPad Pro. What a lucky girl.

Of course, we may go pick it up tonight, my wife's car needs some repair, (an assembly of hoses and aluminium that carries coolant from one place to the other is leaking) and we may have to skip the gym, and proceed directly to the store.

Stay tuned for updates.