(If you haven't read all of the epic Saving Jeff series, don't delay, read now so you don't spoil this episode - part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, Part 6, and Part 7)
Bob started dozing softly. His head nodding to the left, and a slight whistle coming from his nose. Using his right hand he scratched at his ear, and his eye. We all stared, we didn't know what to expect, but it wasn't that.
"Should we wake him?" I asked, nobody answered.
Bob stirred, opened his eyes, and asked, "did you hear that?"
Lionel, the technician operating the video/audio feed, slid a knob on an impossibly complicated looking piece of equipment. Out of the hundreds of little slider knobs he picked the correct one, and slid it all the way to the top. Secretly, we were impressed, though, we felt, at least some of us, that either Lionel was lucky, or all of the little knobs did the exact same thing and we had spent way too much on that little contraption.
Lionel acted quickly and turned down the volume, and I am pretty certain he used a different little knob. Note to self, Fire Lionel, that little showoff.
William stood up and asked "are we in the wrong movie?"
He pulled out his script and said, "crap, I'm in the wrong scene." and hustled Stage Left.
In walked Delores. Delores was the most attractive woman in the whole company. Tall, blond flowing hair, statuesque, she was gorgeous. But, beauty is only skin deep, and inside she was as mean as a high school math teacher on a Red Bull binge.
Here is a gratuitous picture of the only mower I have that is still running, as a reminder how angry I am at Sears for turning their back on a loyal customer. |
Anyway, when Delores walked in with her "illegal body and a dress that is too tight,"* we all looked away. And nobody said anything.
Until Bob said. "I see trouble brewing." And on the monitor was a line of boats stretched out as far as vision allowed.
And a haunting voice came over the monitor. "Please take off your shoes, and belts. and leave your bags in the little bins provided." Jeff had developed a serious case of TSA.
*Thank you, Michael Stanley band.
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