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Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Things to worry about.


  1. Al Quida,
  2. Butchers.
  3. Cannibals, hey they eat people, you know.
  4. Dolphins  They are carnivorous, And look at that creepy smile.
  5. Elephants.  They are rampaging through villages everywhere, and I am sure I heard some whispering in the bushes behind the mall last weekend.
  6. Fools, they are taking over,
  7. Gibbons.  Really all of the apes, the last “Planet of the Apes” movie was a blueprint for destruction.
  8. People named Hannibal, they are always causing problems.
  9. Jaguars.  The animal, and the people who drive the car, they are both jerks.
  10. Kangaroos.  Oh sure they look cute, but they are really watching and waiting for a chance to kick your ass.
  11. Leopards.  Don’t walk under any trees.
  12. Mankind.  What makes us think they are so kind anyway, the history of religious persecution, or the wars and oppression.
  13. Neo Nazis.  Nazis have always been hurtful the new ones are no better.
  14. Officials.  Any time you meet an official anything it is almost always a problem.
  15. Platypus.  They are venomous, it keeps people from teasing them about their noses.
  16. Student Drivers.  They are always texting, “hey, going 45 rong way in a res, lol”
  17. Uncle Sam.  He keeps taking money, and never even thanks me.
  18. War Lords.  That is the title of a person looking for trouble.


And these are just the mammals, and only some of them.


1 comment:

  1. Dear Tim, is there any significance to the fact that you named only 18 dangers? Is number 19 to be feared also? Or any number after that? I would appreciate a swift answer since I am over 18 and the whole situation makes me super uneasy.

    ReplyDelete