Acting quickly, the local authorities sent in the finest officials from the Office of Misinformation, and some other people, too. After setting up a perimeter, and establishing a command headquarters, these dedicated professionals made coffee, microwaved some breakfast burritos, and turned on the TV to catch reruns of the A Team. Man, those guys knew how to run an operation.
After what was considered a reasonable interval they issued a press release explaining that the explosions were caused by the underground storehouses of the local power company, AEP. A spokesperson for AEP said "it was all our fault, and we are very sorry."
Yeah, right AEP spokesperson, and well trained, well paid officer of misinformation. What kind of fools do you take us for?
We did a little research, and found startling evidence of several previous occurrences of underground explosions in American cities.
One such incident was explained so beautifully in the documentary "War of the Worlds" starring Tom Cruise. It was a touching, heartwarming, example of man's ability to survive hardship, adversity and alien invasion. We give it 5 stars, Doctor Dawg says, check it out.
We sent an investigative unit to Columbus to find out what really
happened, and they found this startling evidence on the local traffic camera footage. It is probably a good idea to check for man hole covers when parking or stopping for a red light, or stop sign. Also, you might want to purchase our new book, "How to Survive a Movie Plot; A Script for the Rest of Us." It can't hurt.
happened, and they found this startling evidence on the local traffic camera footage. It is probably a good idea to check for man hole covers when parking or stopping for a red light, or stop sign. Also, you might want to purchase our new book, "How to Survive a Movie Plot; A Script for the Rest of Us." It can't hurt.
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