Looking around the world today there is a lot of sadness, a lot of misery, and a lot of loneliness. People are looking for a friendly voice, a soft shoulder, a warm embrace, something to make them happy, anything. It is truly one of the tragedies of our time, we have become so enamored of technology, gadgetry, electronics that we have lost our sense of empathy, we are lost souls drifting in an ocean of communication, without no hope of communing.
Ray Davies sang of the 20th century being a mechanical nightmare, and he had a valid complaint, but this is worse, insidious and omnipresent, we can not escape the grasp of our devices, and find our friends. We can not look past the touch screen to touch the lives of others, unless we can do it online.
What can we do about it? How can we find even a moments respite, a small, warm touching moment of intimacy, a little warmth, the healthy, caring glow of companionship in a world gone mad with the lunacy of electronics? You ask.
We, here at Life Explained (#lifeexplained) are glad you asked. We think having a pet is a wonderful solution. "But," you might protest, "pets can be so time consuming, demand so much attention, are such a huge commitment,in time and money, how can we justify such an investment?"
We, here at Life Explained (#lifeexplained) are glad you brought that up. We have instituted the Rent A Pet Program* (RAPP, for short), a unique, inexpensive, commitment free way to have the loving, comforting presence of a pet, without the long term demands of ownership.
You simply email us tweetTweetJohn@yahoo.com with the dates you would like to have a pet, and we will send Dr. Dawg* over to cover the requested days, offering companionship, sympathy and caring, loving friendship, all for one low price.
Imagine coming home to this loving face after a hard thankless day at work. Picture the joy you would feel having a companion waiting at the door, an understanding, caring pet, that offers nothing but compassion, and love. No judgement, no demands, just love. And, if he could make a pan of killer lasagna wouldn't that be even better?
Doesn't that sound joyous? Wouldn't you like that? Of course you would. Act now, while there are still openings in the schedule, the holidays are a very stressful time and we expect a lot of demand, so reserve your Dr. Dawg visit now.
*Dr. Dawg and Rent A Pet are exclusive Life Explained properties, except no substitutes. Life Explained (#lifeexplained) is not responsible for unfulfilled expectations, or any cardiovascular conditions resulting from consuming the comfort food that Dr. Dawg specializes in making. Tell your doctor about any heart conditions, hypertension, or lactose intolerance, but, we, here at Life Explained think your doctor probably already knows.
Saturday, November 8, 2014
Finally, a Solution to the worlds problems,
There is not much to say, but, for those who find any offense, please remember these are only stories, jokes, and have no relation to reality. Kind of like life.
I like life, and hope it lasts a long time, but it does require some explanation, that is why these blogs exist. To help people navigate times and events that make no sense.
Here are a few places you can find a few things.
The Original Life Explained. Where it all started, a little rambling and a lot of nothing important.
Life Explains The End Views on humanity's race to self extinction. I hope I am wrong.
Life Explains Smiles Because everybody likes it when you smile.
Life Explains Aging Getting older is not always easier, but it is worth the effort. And a few small things can make it much more pleasant.
Life Explains Traveling and Commuting Mostly commuting. Driving bugs me and working bugs me so driving to work is the ultimate insult of modern life, and I like to complain.
Life Explained Explores History. The real problem with history is there is so much of it. It is all over the place. But, if you take the time to look at the small pieces it is fascinating.
Life Explains Music Music is a universal language. I like guitar based rock and roll, but there is a little bit of a lot here.