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Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Maybe we should try "social welfare organization."

We, here at Life Explained (#lifeexplained) have decided to become a tax exempt organization.  It is a lot easier to make some serious cash that way.  Plus, it would really cut down on the paperwork, probably.  We are not sure what type yet, but we are leaning toward a Labor Organization, since we have been known to really bust some sweat, particularly on Taco Tuesday, man it can get intense.

Each person in the line douses his taco with the spiciest, hottest salsa, and then adding crushed, red peppers, and tabasco. Everyone, to a person, pouring on a little more than the previous consumer.  All in an effort to prove his superior masculinity, and worthiness, as evidenced by his ability to endure burning, blinding, crippling pain, and toxic heartburn.  "Oh, did you add hot sauce to yours, I don't see any," and similar remarks inflame the situation.  Teaspoons are replaced by table spoons, giving away to serving spoons, to ladles, eventually somebody will just pour it over the top of his taco, a volatile, inflammatory gravy.

Jalapeno, habanero, and ghost pepper odors mixing with the smell of uncontrolled agony, and the sounds of weeping, and thrashing about overwhelm the senses.  People are laying on the floor, palsy beginning to set in, longing for a drink of water, hoping for release.  But, still saying, "this is kind of mild, isn't it?  We should really get something with a little kick.  Unless you guys can't handle it."  Sweat and tears streaming down a reddened face contorted by torment, asking for just a touch more Red Devil sauce.

But, we don't know if that kind of labor once a week is enough to get us by.   Remember what Groucho Marx said.  "The secret of life is honesty, and fair dealing.  If you can fake those, you've got it made."  We needed a backup plan.

Maybe we could file as an educational and research facility 501 (3) (c).  It makes sense, we are always learning, and teaching, and research is the engine that drives the boat.  We are born educators, with a passion for knowledge.

Last Tuesday we asked our CPA about the chances of getting a 501 (c) plan, and he said we would be lucky to get a 501 (d-).  Maybe Mexican food doesn't agree with him, some lightweights
can't handle a little spice, you know.