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Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Team Building, and Brotherhood in the Workplace

Today we are going to talk briefly about the importance of maintaining a decent relationship with your coworkers. You spend so much time at work, and so many things require cooperation, and mutual respect that it is foolish to bicker and quarrel with fellow employees.

We, here at Life Explained, take our responsibilities toward our fellow stakeholders very seriously. We bought in a consultant from a large consulting firm to help us build strong ties, and foster a feeling of camaraderie, and mutual understanding.

One of the first exercises was called "Building Understanding Through Healthy Exchange And Dialogue. The consultant gave everybody a piece of paper and a pen. and asked us all to write down a secret, something shameful, and dark, that was never talked about, at work, or home, or even in our cups.

It seemed unusual, but we, here at Life Explained, take things very seriously. We obliged, handing our darkest secrets to this well dressed guy with the expensive looking watch and briefcase.  He sat down, at the table, on the stage in the auditorium, and read them.  His face became increasingly distorted, his eyes darting around the room, sweat started to bead on his brow, and his hands were shaking.

He left the papers, and the briefcase, and ran out the door, screaming "you people should be put away."

We were shocked. What was that all about?  Everybody looked at the person beside them, wandering what sort of monster was in the seat, right next to them. What had they done that was so awful that it would send a growing man running at full speed, screaming at full volume, from a crowded auditorium. An auditorium we had spent a considerable sum to rent.

Everybody was afraid to make any sudden moves, sitting next to... well, who knows what kind of beast they were sitting beside.

Security gathered the papers, and burned them. The consulting company refunded our money, very quickly. We decided joining a bowling league was a good way to build a sense of family, and it was.

In fact the results were so phenomenal we have decided to branch out a little. We have seen first hand the money that team work consultants charge, and there is no reason we can't bring in a little of that. Welcome to the "Life Explained Teamwork, Unity, Sanity and the Evolution of Advanced Teamwork."  We are here to help.

By the way, this is the first of the new logos, if you like it please let us know, if you don't like it, please tell us you like it, we are very fragile, just kidding, let us know if we are headed in the right direction.