SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST. This phrase never sounded more true. I have a lot of things going around me. Here's the saddest tale.
Everyone was celebrating the arrival of 2014. I walked silently along the coast of the Indian ocean,
occasionally shelling the ocean with my automated rifle, occasionally shelling the pounding surf with a small, organic mortar tube. I had always been of violent nature. While, I was busy entertaining my sadistic self. I found a shark walking along. How's a shark walking? That sounds bizarre, right? Puzzling as well, but truth be told, it's exactly what happened. 
The shark walked on its legs. It even smiled at me, and then winked, and in another moment, it suddenly attacked. The surprise attack had me taken aback, and before I could do much, it dropped me with a Tornado kick and then tried a standing Moon Sault, but I escaped ever so slightly, and that was the opening I needed. I retaliated with a leg drop, and then a knee to the head of the fallen shark, and as it stood up, I performed a blistering Super kick, and then used my excellent grappling and submission skills to put the heavyweight creature at place, and a final German Suplex and the shark crawled back to sea.
This incredible fantasy like event had me wondering, until I saw an Octopus, that had a camera, and had shot the entire scene. It requested my consent for the fight to be uploaded on its YouTube channel, and offered me $1500 for my trouble, and I couldn't disagree. I've seen the video, but I have, and Octopus Ryan has done a great job of making me look a star, and I confess I look fantastic putting the demonic creature away.
Unfortunately, Tim Clark saw the video as well, and then my life changed, initially for the better, and then when the blur of working for millions went off. Only remained me, my empty bank account the oceans, with all its ecosystem, and Ryan - The Octopus shooting sunbathing jelly fishes for it's YouTube channel.
See you with the next chapter: $1500 to $970M.
[Disclaimer: Everyone who's involved with human rights - All the animals used in the story are nonexisting, and have been brought up for the sole purpose of making an otherwise shrunken, underweight, specks wearing, no table breaking, wannabe writer look strong.]
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