Last Night, the Application Process Begins.

Since it is almost the weekend, and there are so many things going on we will make this brief. Today is not the time to find fault with the 10 candidates who were driven like cattle into Cleveland, and forced to confront their most profound insecurities last night.

Who among us has not been looking for a job in a cutthroat world of potential employees? We should take pity on these poor, lost souls who want nothing more than to earn a living an provide for their family. 

In many ways it saddens us, here at Life Explained, that with the popularity of "American Idol," "America's Got Talent," and others, that finding a decent job has turned into such a gladiatorial contest. Each potential associate having to defend a record of employment, and service, in front of a panel of indifferent, callous human resource personnel.

Imagine trying to land a job as a grocery bagger with the other applicants making snide comments about your oafish appearance, and the likelihood of you klutzing a whole container of cottage cheese onto the floor, watching it burst open, and make an awful mess, right in the middle of the rush for Thanksgiving. That would be awful. Who among us could handle that kind of pressure?

Oh, well that makes more sense. We really liked that guy with the hair, he could bag our groceries any time.

And the Winner Is? Who knows?

In six days one of the biggest shows of the year is taking place in Cleveland, OH. It is the first of what appears to be eleven Republican debates. Of course the first debate in either party is always the most exciting, because of the size of the field, and the wide open nature of the forum. At this point nobody has really established a loyal following, all of the voters are just walking down the buffet line, trying a little of this, in the past it might have been a little taste of Gingrich on a Balanced Budget roll, or perhaps a little Kerry on an Increased Educational Opportunity wafer. Normally, nobody has really picked a main course yet.

"The Donald" has thrown a monkey wrench into the works. He has taken a commanding lead in the polls, mostly by not really answering questions. Always a good tactic this early, but "the Donald" has taken this to new heights. Sometimes he doesn't answer the question while it is still being asked, talking right over the top of the press person.

It is not too difficult to imagine Donald Trump talking from the beginning of the debate to the end, without stopping. Moderators fidgeting nervously with microphones, pens and note cards. Other candidates watching in helpless terror as the debate is turned into the latest installment of reality television.

How would this play in America. Probably pretty well if the current slate of programming is any
indication. It could turn into Presidential Survivor, or Presidential Professional Wrestling. A weekly display of brutality, subterfuge, and oversized egos and personalities. All vying for the love, or despisement of the American television audience. Or, if it should be a little lighter it could be more like the Harlem Globetrotters barnstorming across the country, winning game after game against a determined but over matched foe.

Of course, the politicians who are not practiced reality television stars are not in favor of the transition. Across Iowa and New Hampshire they are meeting with advisers, and coaches, and strategists about the best way to combat the Trump menace.

Rob Portman, from Ohio, who seems to be a pretty decent guy, considering he is a politician, said the best tactic in this situation would probably be "one liners, and humor." Avoid getting drawn into the rhetoric, and anger. It could draw attention to a candidate and become a clip shown again and again. He stopped short of suggesting a "Last Comic Standing" approach, but it might work.

Anyway, things are warming up. I am stocking up on snacks, something healthy, and drinks, probably carbonated water, and getting ready for the first show down of the year. It could be epic. I hope the good guy wins.

Winter Wonderland, I Wonder Why It Is Here So Early.

Sunday, cold, dreary, and forbidding.  Yesterday, not too bad, tomorrow will be worse, maybe.  Apparently there is a big storm heading our way, rain, snow, bitter cold, which, according to SixOnYourSide meteorologist Phil Kelly, is traveling right along the I-70 corridor (a strip of concrete, running mostly east and west that cuts Ohio roughly in half), storming down the freeway.  Unfortunately, we live, and work, just north of the well traveled freeway.

It is very unfortunate the storm did not choose to take Interstate 80 which runs in an east and west direction far north of us.  Research into storm behavior indicates a general reluctance by arctic storm systems to pay the exorbitant tolls on certain Interstate Highway systems.  The NOAA believes this may be the main cause of Lake Effect Snow.  Storms roll through Chicago, spending all of the spare change in the glove compartment, and they get to the area in northern Ohio, containing Toledo, and Cleveland, and run out of money to go farther.  It is what they call the "Grapes Of Wrath" syndrome.  The National Weather Service remains unconvinced.  They feel pretty certain that the recent improvements in The Rust Belt makes it such a nice place to visit that storms are loath to leave.

Of course, that is no consolation to us right now, with a winter storm bearing down on us, no stop signs, traffic lights, or roundabouts to slow it down.  Curse you efficient, convenient Modern Highways.

But, we here at Life Explained, (#lifeexplained) have come up with an elegant, easy, inexpensive solution.  We should just put up a detour sign right at the I-70 and I-75 interchange in Dayton.  "Interstate 70 closed east of Dayton, Local Traffic Only, Please Take I-75 South to Lexington then I-64 to Charleston, and I-79 tou to Pittsburgh."  Take that John Calipari!

It will not take long to print and erect a sign, but, with the shortsighted, narrow minded, self absorbed state government, obsessed with infighting, and the gathering and hording of wealth and completely unconcerned with the welfare of the citizens, it will never happen.  So we might as well grab the snow shovels, schnapps, stocking hats, gloves and thermal clothing, it is going to be a long winter.