http://tim-thingsastheyare.blogspot.com/ Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Aging, Is It Right For You?

Today we are going to discuss one of the worst problems facing the aging population in America.  A problem that is normally pushed under the rug of polite conversation, hidden in the armoire of good manners, covered up with the white lacy table cloth of graciousness and the little hand tatted doilies of courtesy.  A problem that is not going to go away if ignored, a problem that needs to be discussed.  That's right, aging Americans are getting older, and there are serious problems involved.   Ask any old person what the biggest problem with aging is and they will tell you, it is growing older, it stinks!

If you don't think aging is a real problem just take a look at Keith Richards (but don't look too long, it is kind of like staring into the sun, it will burn your retinas).  Of course, in the social media jargon of the aging he is what is called an "extreme ager," one of those sickening over-achievers that has to age faster and more completely than anybody.  In fact, he is going to receive the Life Time Achievement Award from the AARP at the convention in Tampa Bay next year, if he lives that long, and the old folks at the AARP* can remember where they put the award, and who Keith Richards is, and that they are having a convention in Tampa Bay.

Besides the aesthetically negative effects aging, there are other issues, almost as important.  Old people can no longer dress in cool clothes.  Well, they can, but their children will ridicule them.**  Kids can be so cruel.

Almost as tragic, is the declining health, and decreasing physical abilities.  Instead of opening a bag of potato chips (ambrosia, for sure), pouring some in a bowl, closing the bag, putting it in the cupboard, and politely snacking, one chip at a time while catching the game (like wives everywhere prefer), an aging person is so exhausted, and sore  from opening the bag (are these childproof bags, or what?) all they can do to crawl out to the recliner, and eat the whole bag.***

So, before you get any older think about it, there are some real thorny issues involved.  But, the choice is yours.  You were warned though, so don't come whining to us.

* Just kidding, I am a member of AARP, and love the free donuts membership provides.
** Just ask my kids, who are among the most cruel.
*** Dammit, I can't believe I forgot to grab a beer, "hey is anybody here, someone go get me a beer, please."