Lately, we here at Life, Explained, have begun a long trek backward, through time, in an effort to understand the present, perhaps explain our current predicament, maybe offer a path out of the morass in which humanity finds itself mired. It is difficult, dangerous work, but we are happy to do it, that's right, we are happy doing difficult, dangerous work if you, the Life Explained Universe benefits, even a little. It is what we do. The real problem with history, though, is the quantity, it just goes on and on, and no matter where you start it always leads to something else. Still, if one has iron like resolve, and a keen eye for detail, there are many valuable lessons to be learned by the observant time traveler.
We will start with management styles throughout the ages. Genghis Khan was a guy who got stuff done. He was a brilliant motivator, with a hands on style that inspired his subordinates, worried competitors, garnered loyalty, and produced results. There was no attendance/tardiness policy, people didn't hang around chatting by the elevator, no small talk over oatmeal, toast and fresh squeezed juice in the kitchen. As a result of his no-nonsense practices the Mongol Conglomerate and Associates controlled between 11 and 12 million contiguous square miles, from the Sea of Japan all the way to the Caspian Sea. That is market share that Apple and Coca Cola only dream about.
Sure, in today's namby-pamby, wussified, decadent, decaying, squishy soft corporate environment the Khan's management practices would be frowned upon. For example, he had everything arranged in sequences of ten, and if you were negotiating a "corporate restructuring," and two of the members of your "executive council" decided to "pursue less stressful avenues of employment" somewhere quieter and more sedate you were all "let go." It was an exit interview best avoided.
One of the many benefits of employment with the Khan was travel. His staff would take extended recruiting trips to foreign, exotic places filled with interesting, diverse people. Sometimes things would not go well, and the hosts would not accept the generous offer of employment, and a long, healthy life, and things might get tense, and tumultuous, but no job is without stress. Remember the old saying, "you can't make an omelet without destroying a city, crushing its defenses, razing its buildings, and slaughtering its inhabitants." And the Mongols really liked omelets.
Of course, everything old is new again, so some day we will see the rise of the next great motivator, a man who can bring people together, and lead by example. Until then I am going to fix myself a sandwich, and some cocoa, hang out in the break room and watch some streaming video on my iPhone, and maybe sharpen my war ax, just in case.
Friday, May 9, 2014
There is not much to say, but, for those who find any offense, please remember these are only stories, jokes, and have no relation to reality. Kind of like life.
I like life, and hope it lasts a long time, but it does require some explanation, that is why these blogs exist. To help people navigate times and events that make no sense.
Here are a few places you can find a few things.
The Original Life Explained. Where it all started, a little rambling and a lot of nothing important.
Life Explains The End Views on humanity's race to self extinction. I hope I am wrong.
Life Explains Smiles Because everybody likes it when you smile.
Life Explains Aging Getting older is not always easier, but it is worth the effort. And a few small things can make it much more pleasant.
Life Explains Traveling and Commuting Mostly commuting. Driving bugs me and working bugs me so driving to work is the ultimate insult of modern life, and I like to complain.
Life Explained Explores History. The real problem with history is there is so much of it. It is all over the place. But, if you take the time to look at the small pieces it is fascinating.
Life Explains Music Music is a universal language. I like guitar based rock and roll, but there is a little bit of a lot here.