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Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Tuesday, better than Monday, and Looky what we have, some new guys.

Yesterday was very stressful, it was Monday, and I had a dentist appointment, both of which are bad.   Plus there was a large shipment delivered at work, which is always bad. And it rained, which, considering the amount of rain we have had lately, is very bad. It was kind of a bad day.

But, the dentist appointment went off without a snag, a cavity or even a lecture on flossing, that was good. Somebody put away the entire shipment last night, which was good. And, the sun is shining, for now, nobody will say that is not good.

Every time we get a new shipment someone will ask me to change a few "locs" which is "distribution center*" jargon for "locations.**" Because warehouse workers are way to busy to use sound out all three syllables. Have you gone mad?

Anyway, on the packing list for this large shipment of expensive, highly sought after gift ware, and decorative items, which contained all of the new locations there was a series of illustrations. I am not sure who, or what they represent, but they made me smile and that was great.

It seems like they should be hired to work here. Little mad scientists, working hard to save humanity from mankind, which is the whole purpose of the blog.  Which was a great idea.

So far it has worked splendidly, too. Last time we checked humanity was still in contention for last species to face extinction. With the Earth still spinning, and the Leap Second made inconsequential, except for a little extra sleep.  It was so smart to add the second in the middle of the night. Think of the rioting has everybody been required to work an extra second, without compensation.  That was our idea, by the way. Wasn't that great?

Of course, before we can hire anybody, we will have to fabricate a background story, and "send in a resume." So, if anybody has any ideas we, here at Life Explained, regarding any of our potential new employees we would be thrilled to hear from you.*** That would be so great.

*Which is a freighted self important way to say warehouse.

** Not really, nobody around here talks like that. For a brief time I worked in an enormous "distribution center" and everybody talked like that, and I said terrible things about them. I am trying to encourage this sort of silliness. It will give me a convenient reason to ridicule my coworkers. Until then there are other things.

*** Yes, I know I switched from reality to fiction and personal point of view, but those sorts of things are bound to happen when you let a "distribution center" employee write his own blog.