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Thursday, January 21, 2016

Some days things work out, some days they don't.

We were looking for a customer for our newest missile systems, an ingenious new weapons delivery platform. It uses an interdimensional drive module that makes it invisible until seconds before impact (please see the attached video for a demonstration*). By then it is too late for counter measures, unless you count uncontrollable sobbing and desperate begging as effective anti-missile defenses.

Turns out the namby pamby, technophobes in charge of weapons development want missiles they can track. It seems they are uncomfortable with explosive ordnance that just vanishes, poof, and magically appears on target. As far as we can tell it had something to do with Amelia Earhart, the Battleship Eldridge and the Philadelphia Experiment, whatever that was.

Even worse, all of the nations with any real cash for buying weapons felt the same. They had all lost some expensive, irreplaceable something at one time or another.

Then we heard, through back channels, about a giant, omnipotent organization, cloaked in secrecy, working behind the scenes to manipulate the the human race. A faceless, nameless entity, possibly evil, certainly controlling that had its dirty little fingers in everybody's pie.

What the heck, we reasoned. They are probably not interested in the mysterious vanishing missile but maybe we could get them to buy the company, and we could retire, with a little dignity, a little coin, and time to enjoy life.

Our lawyer contacted them. Here is their response.

* Attached Video