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Showing posts with label space ship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label space ship. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

A Colony on Mars, Wow, That's Big Time.

It was a great relief when the ship was finally finished.  Man we had been working on it for days.  "We should open a facility on Mars.  How hard would it be to build a interplanetary space ship?"  Dr. Dawg asked, at the Monday Morning production meeting.

Bob, from the commissary dropped his donut, right onto his khaki pants, the chocolate leaving an almost perfect circle halfway between his knee and his hip.  Slowly, almost painfully the donut tumbled onto the grey carpet, chocolate clashing with the delicate maroon pattern.  He sat there, slumped forward in the black padded chair, his mouth wide open, chocolate stained pants, a look of absolute amazement stamped on his face.

Bill, from Research and Development dropped his coffee, a large styrofoam cup from a local convenience store, the logo "Drink Our Coffee, We'll Make Some More" screamed from opposite sides, onto the dark wood top of the table.  It did not take long for the scalding liquid to find its way to the edge.  Forming a dark, steaming waterfall, it poured onto the floor with a noisy splash.  Bil looked crazily, and coffeeless, at Dr. Dawg.

A breakfast burrito fell, with a wet plop, to the floor, salsa, scrambled eggs, shredded sausage, bacon and hashbrowns exploding into a splatter all around "ground zero."  A China plate fell, and shattered, sending sharp, glass like pieces, and syrupy, buttery waffles all over.  A glass of orange juice, and a pitcher of water, a cup of tea, and flask filled with Scotch whisky, smash, crash, splash.  

Soon, Jim from Custodial Services stood up and said, "alright, that's enough.  We are not cleaning this mess."

So, after cleaning the meeting room we built the ship that would take the first batch of colonists to Mars.  Thank goodness we had been saving all of those parts, for all of those years.  Our earliest days as a company were lean and we learned not to waste.  

Tomorrow we start loading the provisions, after we negotiate what those provisions will be, of course.  I hope we pick some donuts, everybody likes those.  We might still have some room, if you're interested.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Lunch, Some Day it Might be You, (enjoy it while you can).

Since it is Monday, and we have had such a busy weekend, here at the top secret Life Explained headquarters, we smoked a brisket, ran an auger, took apart (kind of) a major electric appliance, watched the new Hercules, with Dwayne (the Rock) Johnson, (yes, we can smell what the Rock is cooking, and in this case it was ancient Grecians, Greeks, Greekians..., people from ancient Greece), made a pan of killer lasagna, watched some football, watched some made trips to three, or four hardware stores, and updated the software on an iPad, we decided we were not in the mood to make lunch.

Of course that led to the constant, bickering and arguments, and turmoil.  What do you want, Pizza, Mexican food, Italian food, Asian, burgers, it is amazing how childish scientists working in a cutting edge, state of the art, top flight research and development facility can be.  It consumed the whole morning, and started to get so heated we had to lock the weapons lab, and post an armed guard at the entrance, an armed guard who had brought a lunch and could not be swayed by promises of hot spicy chicken wings, or tasty, sweet deserts.

Finally, about 11:30 we came up with the perfect plan.



That's right, we chose Alien food, it isn't always delicious, and you can never be too sure what you are eating, but, at least it isn't eating you, and that is always a plus.  Plus, it really hits the spot after a busy weekend.  Don't forget to reserve your Thanksgiving meal today, they are going fast, and it might be you or them, do you really want to take that chance?