We agreed to drop that idea, and they let the rest of us leave, alive. After a few threats, and promises of terrible retribution.
We still wanted to help the cities and states of this fine country. Years of mismanagement, neglect, and governmental supervision have left them drained, bankrupt and hopeless. Yet, they still have citizens to protect, serve and clean up after. There are parades, fireworks, celebrations all requiring capitol. And people are not keen to give up these ostentatious displays of societal unity, despite the crippling effect on the budget. We are sticking together if it kills us.
We need look no further than the highly profitable world of professional sports for the solution to this crippling problem. Corporate sponsorship. Start small. Auction the naming rights to streets. Imagine the ease with which "Bob's House of Paints Third Avenue" rolls off the tongue.
"Where do you live?"
"At the intersection of Biff's Tattoos Main Street and Sid's Pawn Shop Atlantic Avenue. It is the green house with the brown yard, you can't miss it."
So, we are selling the naming rights to Life Explained. Think of the potential, The Kraft Macaroni and Cheese blog Explaining Life.
You don't want to miss out on this exciting, ground floor opportunity. Break out the check book now, while there is still time. Or, we might just start printing our own money, we do make a striking monetary unit, though.