Bracketology, Hope Springs Eternal.

It is a bad day, here at the Life Explained Department of Bracketology.* The team we had picked to win the championship has been eliminated already. Yes, we understand that technically the tournament hasn't really started yet. But, technically the team we picked, our favorite team is not in that tournament. They are in the NIT, or they were in the NIT until last night, when they lost.

You see, we had this plan. Somewhere between The Dirty Thirty Two** and the Sweet Sixteen we were going to sneak the Nebraska Cornhuskers into the tournament using the difficult, dangerous double pincer movement made famous by the Ancient Greeks in the decisive battle of Marathon where they used it to such brutal effectiveness against the numerically superior Persian Army. Immortalized in the movie, "Wow, I Did Not See That Coming."

But, they lost to Mississippi State in Starkville. In a game that should have been in Lincoln. More accurately should have been today in the NCAA tournament, but don't get us started about that, we are still furious.



Anyway, we had them sneaking in, unnoticed and winning it all. We hadn't worked out all the details yet, but it involved kidnapping a team, swapping uniforms, and sending them to play in the other tournament. While Nebraska took their rightful place in the Championship game.

But, it didn't work out. Not this year, anyway. So, we have started bracketologing the hell out of next year already. I don't want to give too much away, but Nebraska wins the national championship. And we all go home happy. 




* Not affiliated with the NCAA, Espn, CBS, or any of those other Bracketologists.

** Not the real nickname for the round with thirty two teams, we aren't sure if it has a proper name yet. If not this one is for sale, please contact our attorneys, or just send us cash, we aren't fussy.

NCAA Championship, too bad there is not more than one.

Monday is the National Championship Game in college basketball.  Duke (the Blue Devils) will face Wisconsin (the Red Devils, just kidding, they are the Badgers, but a game between two teams called the Devils would be cool).  It should be a good game, pitting Duke's trio of Freshmen against Wisconsin's veteran squad of upperclassmen.  Two experienced coaches whose teams are fundamentally sound, disciplined, and talented.

Of course, if anybody had been paying attention, they would see neither of these teams were in my Final Four, let alone the championship game, so it would be OK with me if they both lost.

Wisconsin did beat Kentucky, and as a Louisville fan that makes me happy, so Wisconsin would be alright.  And, if Duke win, our friend stands to win some money in her office pool, so Duke would be cool, so Duke might be a good choice.

However, having been a North Carolina fan for so long it is difficult to wish anything but evil for Duke.  So, that is kind of a tough call.

Since I am a Nebraska fan, and Wisconsin beat them so soundly earlier this year, it is so hard to hope for any success for them.

Being a sports fan can be a difficult, trying, labor of decision, loss, and sacrifice.  When the tournament starts a team is chosen, and certain emotional investments are made.  It becomes a relationship, you and the team, struggling, battling other teams, corrupt, myopic, referees, and partisan announcers.

Most times the team you have chosen to win, the team you really like, does not win, and you have to choose a secondary team.  And, the cycle starts over, often that will lose.  It is a roller coaster, hope and joy, and potential followed by crushing, terrible, heart breaking sorrow, and defeat.

Laughter, tears, elation, pain, and soon there is nobody left on the initial "I could live with any of these teams winning" list.  You are forced to choose from the lesser of the evils, and sometimes the evils are almost equal.

Then, you are forced to choose between untenable choices, and when the game starts it becomes a painful, tense, torturous exercise in avoidance.  It is like watching your parents fight, if you hate both of your parents, and are secretly wishing they would rip each other to pieces, be arrested, and spend the rest of their miserable lives rotting in a gulag, shovels in hand.  Well, that might be stretching the metaphor.

So, I will watch the game with difficulty, and a troubled conscience on Monday night, and dream of both coaches digging salt in a Russian mine.  Not really, and I always wanted the fights between my parents to end amicably.  I will probably root for Duke, my friend always invites me to participate in her company's NCAA pool, and she is my friend that is some powerful magic.

My Bracket, it was fun while it lasted.

As promised yesterday, here is my bracket for the NCAA tournament (2015 version).

Obviously, I am almost eliminated already.  That is really the plan, you know (not really)?  While everybody else is watching, tense, nervous, constantly checking their bracket, and their place in the bracket challenge(s). Chewing their fingernails, snapping at their families, cursing co-workers, spewing anger, disappointment, hate, and intolerance, just waiting for the hammer to drop I will be enjoying an icy cold, delicious beverage, and a tasty, warm, and with luck, healthy snack, and basketball.  This leaves me free to curse the refs, the fates, the unfortunate string of poor free throw shooting, the coriolis effect that is certainly reducing the three point shooting percentage of my team, anything that makes a convenient excuse for my team losing, almost without care.  

I know picking Kansas to win is crazy (forgive me Bill Self) they may be home before next weekend, but you have to pick somebody, and it should be somebody in the top 4 seeds.  I would have picked Louisville, except they showed Chris Jones the door, and losing your starting point guard right before the tournament is a bad omen.  And, in all fairness, I probably did pick them to win in one of the other brackets, I don't remember, and will let you know for sure, maybe.  And, as discussed yesterday, picking someone I don't want to win is impossible.  It leaves me rooting for a team I want to lose, or rooting against my bracket, and that is too much to ask. 

Here is my bracket with friendly, little cartoon people and musical accompaniment from the Spencer Davis Group.  You have to love those guys.

So, that is mine, enjoy, share yours if you want, the email address it tweettweetjohn@yahoo.com, and it will be posted here, for posterity.   And, if that makes you uncomfortable, that's cool, enjoy the tournament, I hope you win, I am pulling for you all the way.

Saint Patrick Probably would not pick the Fightin' Irish.

Yesterday was Saint Patrick's Day, a day to celebrate all things Irish.  Except for Saint Patrick, it seems, from some preliminary research, he was not born in Ireland.  He was born in Roman Britain, kidnapped and sold into slavery in Ireland, and after escaping to a Monastery in Gaul (France) he returned to Ireland.

He made the Druids stop practicing their religion, claiming it was paganistic, and not his religion.  Since this was such a bigoted, narrow minded act they made him a bishop, and then a saint.  It is unclear why Saint Patrick's Day strikes such a chord.  It seems most saints have a day, and looking into the days, it seems most of them have a saint, but, this one really gets all the press.

Green clothes, green derbies, green beer, green is everywhere.  Maybe that is why this one is so important, it has a color.  What color would you ascribe to Saint David of Wales (March 1st) or Saint Leander of Seville (March 13th)?  Nobody would know what to wear.  Saint Patrick, put on some green, find a parade, and things are rolling.

So, we move on, another Saint Patrick's Day, come and gone, the world returns to normal.  Which is no picnic, either.  Maybe nobody noticed through the green haze enveloping the world yesterday, but life still defies explanation.

If it weren't for the NCAA tournament I am not sure there would be any point at all.  Thank goodness for college basketball.  To make a point, I plan to post my bracket picks right here, for all the world to see. And, if you can find a way to choose teams in a pattern of diametric opposition you will probably do pretty well, kind of a public service from the good people at Life Explained.

In fact, if you send me your bracket as a JPG file I will post it here, as well.  And then complete strangers can question your sanity, loyalties and ability to pick a decent bracket.  Whoever wins, and by wins I mean has the appearance of the most correct choices, as judged by me, probably, (unless I can convince someone else to do it) will get a bit part in the movie, based on the best seller "Life Explained, a Primer in the Explanation of Life," after I figure out how to explain life, write the book, sell the movie rights, and find a way to influence the agency in charge of casting.  It should not be a problem, though.

So, email your bracket to me, at tweettweetjohn@yahoo.com.  Anytime before the end of the tournament. Submissions received after the tournament will not be accepted, unless they are accompanied by a $5.00 bill.

Thank you, and good luck,

Management,