Tax season is here, and we here at Life Explained want you to get every cent you can. So, we are offering our Tax Preparedness Preparation Course, free of charge. We know you work hard for your money... OK, we know you work for your money... Alright, we know you get money on a schedule for your unique ability to not make things worse, too much, and you want to keep all of the money you can. Let some other sucker pay for Congress, and the National Parks, you need your money. With that in mind here are some "Non-Standard" deductions that many alleged tax return preparation professionals will miss.
1.) Don't forget to claim your beer expenses. It is a medical necessity, an antidote to stress, and the trials of everyday life. If your doctor will not endorse the necessary forms that is fine, we have a staff of doctors in house who will gladly write the "beer prescription" for you.
2.) Those late night trips to the Taco Hut, and Burger Heaven are charitable donations. How else are these businesses going to stay open until 2:00 in the morning without some brave, kind soul rushing in to order the Belt Busting Behemoth Burrito, with extra Sour Cream, or the Heapin' Helpin' O' Heaviness Burger, with Secret Cheese Like Sauce. And, if they didn't stay open until 2:00 every morning, how would the dedicated professionals manning the register, grill and drive through window replace that income. You are almost a hero.
3.) A lot of people overlook the clothing deduction. You need clothes to work, and they can be expensive. Just try showing up for work in your pajamas, or your swimsuit, and soon the legitimacy of the clothing deduction becomes obvious. And, as far as the IRS is concerned swim wear, and pajamas, are clothes.
Tune in tomorrow when we discuss the best tax sheltered retirement accounts that you can start with the change from your couch.
Don't fret tax season, we are here to help, it is not a difficult process, one even we can understand. And, in the unlikely case you are audited, we have daily flights to many countries that don't extradite. With an inflight refreshments, including a small, small drink, and free peanuts, at least 10 but not more than 15.
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
Oh The Joys of Spring, and Tax Preparation.
There is not much to say, but, for those who find any offense, please remember these are only stories, jokes, and have no relation to reality. Kind of like life.
I like life, and hope it lasts a long time, but it does require some explanation, that is why these blogs exist. To help people navigate times and events that make no sense.
Here are a few places you can find a few things.
The Original Life Explained. Where it all started, a little rambling and a lot of nothing important.
Life Explains The End Views on humanity's race to self extinction. I hope I am wrong.
Life Explains Smiles Because everybody likes it when you smile.
Life Explains Aging Getting older is not always easier, but it is worth the effort. And a few small things can make it much more pleasant.
Life Explains Traveling and Commuting Mostly commuting. Driving bugs me and working bugs me so driving to work is the ultimate insult of modern life, and I like to complain.
Life Explained Explores History. The real problem with history is there is so much of it. It is all over the place. But, if you take the time to look at the small pieces it is fascinating.
Life Explains Music Music is a universal language. I like guitar based rock and roll, but there is a little bit of a lot here.